The Journey of Leaving Anxiety Behind
Anxiety has been something I’ve always struggled with, but it’s increased considerably within the past few years. While I’ve had my triumphs over my anxious heart, I find myself with wide eyes and shaky hands more often than I should. I can’t even count the times I’ve lost myself to fearful tears.
The problem with anxiety is that it sucks the joy out of things. How can I be content when I’m constantly worrying? Anything can get me – driving, work, blogging, or social anxiety. It robs me of my happiness and my ability to enjoy life. It takes away the power of the knowledge that God will always protect me.
But I have hope.
God hasn’t left me, he hasn’t abandoned me, and he knows my heart. His best intentions may not involve my plans, but they include a better one. He is wise, and he loves me. We are living a story, and although we live in a tainted world, this is a story of grace. Not fear.
My life is a path laid out by God’s divine hands. He sees me relaxing, trusting him with my life. And as I slip up, heart beating too fast due to all the “what ifs” and worries, he understands. With grace, he waits. Then, finally, I open up my eyes to my foolishness. I take the next step forward in my journey of leaving anxiety behind.
Repentance is a core part of this journey. This is my chance to lay my sins in front of my God, just so he can sweep them all away with his love. This is how I am forgiven. And this is how I continue on toward belief – toward trust. Toward faith. To live, it is imperative to trust God.
Some Bible Verses
I’ve found that keeping a couple Bible verses around helps calm my fearful soul. I have two that I keep by my bed, always:
Psalm 56:4 (ESV)
In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I shall not be afraid. What can flesh do to me?
The part that gets me here is “What can flesh do to me?” because that’s what my worries are about. I worry about getting hurt, of not being able to complete all of my tasks, etc. Human things. Material things. But those don’t matter because when it comes down to it, my soul is safe.
Isaiah 41:10 (ESV)
. . . fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
It’s so important for me to remember that God is there. That he’ll give me strength when I need it. He’s never going to leave his precious, beloved daughter. I am his, and he won’t ever let me forget.
I am still on this journey, and I will be for a long time. But I can see the end. I can see peace. My heart may not always trust God’s holy hands, but it is constantly growing closer to him. This walk of faith is a hard one, but my eyes are set on his kingdom.